le love | searching and sharing for beauty and love in the everyday life

12:58 AM

BIRTHDAY BLUES

"They said, we write the best when we are sad."

A broken heart may produce a poem, a difficult experience may become a story, and loneliness may become a page filled with thoughts we never knew how to say out loud. Perhaps that is why some of the most touching writing comes from moments of pain. Sadness does not necessarily make us better writers, but it can make us more vulnerable—and vulnerability often makes writing more human. Sadness brings out deeper, more honest side of our creativity. It made us slow down and look inward. It is raw, it is sincere.

...

This year, I am reflecting more than celebrating. No birthday gift for me I guess. I apply for a scholarship but got rejected. I believe I have potential and I care deeply about what I am doing. But still not get picked. It sucks. But maybe this rejection is a little reminder, too, that there is still a part of me that still wants to explore. I still have that ambition. I think that part deserves some space.“When one door closes, another door opens.” I believe God’s plan is bigger than mine. I am taking a pause long enough today to look back. Thinking about dreams I once had and the versions of myself I have outgrown. Maybe that is why I still write here. Because I still grow. Growing older is not simply about adding another year to our lives. It is about carrying every version of ourselves forward—the one who struggled, the one who dreamed, the one who loved, the one who lost, and the one who kept going. Life changed. Marriage, motherhood, responsibilities… and somewhere along the way, your ambitions may have become quieter. But quieter doesn't necessarily mean gone. Sometimes ambition changes shape. Maybe you aren't less ambitious. Maybe you're carrying considerably more life with you now. You can become a version of yourself who is ambitious and curious and responsible, devoted to your family and still excited about what you are pursuing right now. Sometimes strength is simply saying, “This hurts, but I’m going to try again when I’m ready. And the hurt will never change my heart, will never change my passion.” Perhaps that is enough reason to celebrate.

Well, happy birthday.

❤

12:06 PM

THE WARMTH THAT STAYED

"The quite certainty,
of having somewhere,
and someone, to return to." - Family

There is something about the world after rain that makes everything feel a little closer. I have always been a pluviophile, drawn to the quiet magic that rain leaves behind, the softened streets, the earthy scent lingering in the air, and the gentle light that seems to slow the passing of time. Everything feels a little calmer, as if the afternoon has no reason to hurry. This weekend, my family and I made our little escape to Bedugul. Nothing extravagant, just a short weekend retreat—the kind of getaway we often take when we need to step away for a while. We went there with my mother and father, and it has been a long time since I spend time with my parents. Life has a way of moving so quickly. But their love and warmth always lingered. No matter how much time passes or how far life takes us, there is a certain warm love, that never really leaves. It simply stays, quietly waiting for us to return. Here we spent a cozy afternoon in Hilland 1280, a quiet mountain hideaway embraced by emerald-green golf grounds and rolling hills. There was something comforting about the way the landscape seemed to hold the place so gently, as though the hills themselves were wrapping us in a warm embrace. And perhaps it was that stillness that made me think about home. About how home is not always defined by four walls or a familiar address. Sometimes, it is simply the feeling of being with the people who make you feel safe, understood, and completely yourself. The kind of warmth that follows you wherever you go—and remains, even when you leave for a while.

...

Black and white felt like the right language for today—timeless, a little whimsical, with a quiet kind of romance woven between the lines. The polka dots brought a playful rhythm to the monochrome, softening the simplicity of the silhouette with a hint of whimsy. Against the rainy landscape, the black and white seemed to belong there. The muted skies, the misty hills, the softened greens—it all felt like a living photograph in shades of quiet. And playing softly in the background was Jauh Nan Teduh by Monita Tahalea featuring Ananda Badudu. It felt less like a song and more like a companion to the moment—something that slipped quietly between my thoughts and lingered there. After the little drizzle had passed, the song seemed to carry a feeling I couldn't quite name at first. Perhaps it was gratitude. Gratitude for these simple, fleeting moments that make life feel gentle: being somewhere beautiful, wearing something that feels like me, listening to a song I love, and sharing an unhurried afternoon with family. Maybe we don't always need grand adventures to feel grateful. Sometimes, it is enough to pause after the rain and notice what remains. The quiet, the music, the people beside us, the family that makes us feel of home. The rain had passed, but something warm lingered in the air. And somewhere beneath it all was the quiet, familiar warmth of family, of home, and of knowing that wherever we wander, there will always be something that brings us back. It was the warmth that stayed.

❤

Wearing: LAUDI dress, KATE SPADE black chain bag, STACCATO two tone flats
Photos by: Angga Wiadnya

4:03 PM

le love | searching and sharing for beauty and love in the everyday life

BIRTHDAY BLUES

THE WARMTH THAT STAYED

MY FAVORITE VIEW